Please shoot me if I ever do this

Let's establish some things first.

I am at Winco. For those of you who have not been, it is a busy place full of dumb people.
Also, you bag your own groceries. Dumb people have trouble bagging sometimes. I understand this happens, and I have patience so I continue to shop at Winco. James refuses, unless we need to get a lot of stuff, and I go with him. He shops at Safeway.
Anyway, Winco's cashier setup looks like this:














A: Cashier. A Winco cashier is easily spotted in a crowd by looking for dull, lifeless eyes and a fake half-smile. Usually they can't even muster a whole smile, or even a three-quarters one. Their soul has been sucked dry from perhaps only a few days of employment.
F: The box surrounding F is where you pay, i.e. debit card machine and place to write checks.
The two long boxes (B is located in one) are two separate moving tracks where the cashier puts your groceries after scanning them. There is also a button at the other end for customers to push to move the track to get their groceries as they come down the line.
The two smaller boxes (C) is a space to bag your groceries. Bagging is difficult without this space.

So, with that established, let us proceed to the abhorrition of etiquette.
There is this horrendous woman who has purchased an entire year's worth of groceries all in one go, but has limited funds, so she is making the cashier give a continual running total of the groceries. Sometimes, she stops him and makes him take items away. She has two shopping carts overflowing with frozen chicken and top ramen and anything else she could stuff in there.

This is what the shopping carts looked like. On the left, you'll see what looks like a deranged doll. It's not. It's supposed to be a small child. I included it because I figured that if the woman had any small children, they would have easily been misplaced amongst her plethora of Cheetos and bbq sauce.


























The cashier's not done scanning her things, and she already has things piled up on both tracks. Point E represents a shopping cart that is already full of purchased groceries. Horrendous woman is point D, "bagging" things. This woman is the slowest bagger I've ever witnessed. She was picking out items one at a time to strategically place in her empty cart. I understand watching eggs and bananas, but COME ON!! Bacon? Bacon will be FINE next to that 8-lb jar of pickles. So will paper towels. Anyway, there is a lengthy line forming behind her (there is someone in between us, and several people after me). The cashier must wait for her to bag a few things before he can even scan anything else. Then her phone rings and she answers. So now, the slowest woman in the world is now TWICE as slow because she only has one arm free. Apparently, the gossip was extremely important. I've begun staring at her... and I generally don't stare. It's rude. I'm not rude. This woman is rude.
So the woman in between us only has about six items. She has the cashier ring her up and she just plunks the stuff back in her cart, sans bag. She takes about twenty seconds for her entire transaction.
Now it's my turn. I have about four bags worth of things, so I need the track. We wait. The cashier rings up what he can of mine. We wait more. Woman: "Oh my GOSH! Yeah. Yeah. Uh huh... (plunks one item in her cart) No way! -Blah blah blah blah-" (plunks another item in her cart). Finally she has cleared what she thinks is enough things so that I can get my stuff. I try to move my cart down to the end, but point E symbolizes where she has politely left her full cart sitting in the middle of the aisle. It's OBVIOUS that I'm trying to move (points G1 to G2). Oh, and "TP" represents the ginormous thing of toilet paper at the end of the track. And the light blue lines where point C was on the earlier drawing (where I'm supposed to bag) is her twenty loaves of jumbo sized bread. And point F is her half-ingested Sprite.
So, I interrupt her precious phone call. "Yeah, if you could move your cart out of the way, I could get my groceries." She moves her cart about a foot. I shove it the rest of the way. She continues bagging on the other side. I say, "Yeah, is this your toilet paper? It'd be great if you could move it." So she does, while giving me a "look." Continues talking, bagging. "Oh, and your bread is in my way, too."
My tone was not very chipper. One could say we were NOT exchanging pleasantries. Well, I guess she wasn't really talking back, as she was still wrapped up in her phone conversation.
Finally, I get to bag things. The person in line behind me now has many things ready to bag, so I must be fast. I finish all my groceries (4 bags) in the time it takes her to bag one.
Usually, I'm much more patient and understanding of people. Normally I would have helped her bag, or helped her move her things. But no. When people show that level of inconsiderate, asinine public behavior, they get no such sympathy from me. I was terribly tempted to grab the phone out of her hand and explain to her the tenets of etiquette. Yes, I admit it--I was going to go Martha Stuart on her ass.

Instead, I called Hubby, and he politely and patiently heard my story. Such a good husband to hear his wife call up and say, "Oh. My. Gosh. You will NEVER believe what happened at the grocery store." Hey, at least I wasn't talking about shoe shopping.